Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login
         So hard to pretend
         But so easy to lie.

         Not wanting to live
        But too scared to die.

         The feeling rises up
          But drags me down.

      It's less strain to smile
         But easier to frown.



       It's hard to ask for help
               AND YET
          Easy to accept it

    It's selfish to ask others to help
             BUT THEN AGAIN
It's selfish not to give them the chance to

       I feel I don't deserve love
               AND YET
         I yearn for it anyway

          I need a response
              BUT THEN
       I can't bear to read it

          You give me hope
              AND YET
       My cheeks burn in shame

    I have nothing to apologise for
                BUT...

All I can say is sorry...
              Because it's the only thing that even comes close to summing up what I feel:

               Gratitude,
                         Regret

               Affection,
                         Self-hate



                                    Pain...

                                                        ...and shame.
It's just...so awkward, and I'm too scared to say anything about it...

P. S I...know that it meant a lot to me, even if I don't say anything.
Add a Comment:
 
:icondont-be-a-robot:
dont-be-a-robot Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2011
wow. This is very powerful and I find it very relateable
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2011
:aww: thank you sweetheart. :tighthug:
Reply
:iconxwhenseptemberendsx:
xWhenSeptemberEndsx Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2011
Wow. This poem blew me away. Nice job. :)

I have dysthymia, as well as overwhelming anxiety. This poem pretty much sums up how I feel on a day to day basis. But no matter how difficult it gets, no matter how many times you feel like giving up... get through it. I promise you, its worth it. There -is- a light at the end of the tunnel, you just cant see it -yet-.
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2011
:blush: thanks!! :hug: it means a lot. :iconsweethugplz:
Reply
:iconxwhenseptemberendsx:
xWhenSeptemberEndsx Featured By Owner Jul 31, 2011
No problem. ^^
Reply
:iconblind-dancer:
blind-dancer Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
i have that too. so I understand.
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011
:iconsweethugplz:
:heart: thanks for the fave, sweetie. :heart:
Reply
:iconx-xspitfirex-x:
x-xSpitFirex-x Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2011  Hobbyist Photographer
stay strong :heart:
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2011
:tighthug: thank you. :heart:
Reply
:iconmidnitethewarrior:
MidnitetheWarrior Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you for posting this up. Yes, the poem is saddening, But I am glad to know that I am not the only one going through the same thing.
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Jul 21, 2011
If you ever need someone to talk to, note me. :tighthug: I'll be here. :heart:
Reply
:iconmidnitethewarrior:
MidnitetheWarrior Featured By Owner Jul 21, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
thank you. its nice to know there's someone who cares :happycry:
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2011
oh sweetie... :huggle:
Reply
:iconmidnitethewarrior:
MidnitetheWarrior Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
:heart: :hug: :heart:
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2011
:iconsweethugplz:
Reply
:iconchaos-turtle:
Chaos-turtle Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
your not alone
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Jul 21, 2011
:tighthug: thank you sweetie. :heart: :rose:
Reply
:iconshantt:
Shantt Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2011
i know how you feel
it's beautiful! :/
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Jul 21, 2011
:aww: thank you. :tighthug: :heart:
Reply
:iconninquetari:
ninquetari Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2011
It's beautiful!
I can understand these feelings...
Good luck, with everything.
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Jul 21, 2011
:blush: thank you sweetie! :tighthug: :heart:
Reply
:iconninquetari:
ninquetari Featured By Owner Jul 21, 2011
You're welcome!
Thanks for the Llama :) :heart:
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2011
you're welcome! :hug:
Reply
:iconfenris-kin:
Fenris-Kin Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2011  Student Writer
Never before have I seen a piece that so completely encompasses what it's like to live with depression, or any other mental illness for that matter. Thank you for writing this, and sharing it.

Know that you are not alone, and it gets better.
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Jul 21, 2011
:blush: you're welcome. and thank you - so much! :tighthug: :heart:
Reply
:iconcrazyandconfusedone:
crazyandconfusedone Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you for sharing this, I can tell that this is full of emotions that are hard to deal with but you have people you can talk to about it when it gets too tough to handle. Sometimes a complete stranger can save you from those thoughts and feelings... it happened to me, I was very close to harming myself once but a few kind words from someone that didn't even know my name kept it from happening. If you ever need someone to talk to I can be that stranger for you and I don't judge others.
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2011
I - thank you. There's no words, there's not even a damn emoticon, so once again I end up with words that aren't even close. Thank you so much. :tighthug: It means a lot. :heart: :rose: :ashamed:
Reply
:iconcrazyandconfusedone:
crazyandconfusedone Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
You're welcome. I'm just being a nice responsible caring person, I like to help others.
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2011
:tighthug: :heart:
Reply
:iconbuckets-of-blood:
Buckets-of-Blood Featured By Owner Jul 19, 2011
The emotion in this is reall powerful. Thank you for sharing this.
Reply
:iconpoetrice:
poetrice Featured By Owner Jul 19, 2011
thank you. :hug: :heart:
Reply
Add a Comment:
 
×

:iconpoetrice: More from poetrice


Featured in Collections

Poetry by slashaholic-666

123 by Ally-Cullen

Writing by SilverWillow94


More from DeviantArt



Details

Submitted on
July 19, 2011
File Size
2.9 KB
Link
Thumb

Stats

Views
566
Favourites
35 (who?)
Comments
28
×